Dance Poles

In the last few years we’ve come a long way accepting different forms of bedroom play as “normal” or “ordinary”.   Where they were considered taboo or kink not so long ago, they are slowly moving toward mainstream acceptance.  I’ve heard flippant jokes about BDSM on prime-time comedy shows seen platform “dancer” shoes at the neighborhood pub; edgy tattoos and piercings at the DMV.  Kink has finally become commonplace.

 And one of the most beneficial practices that has graduated from taboo to acceptable is the fine art of pole dancing.  Many of the gentlemen’s clubs in my area have Amateur Night events, where anyone can climb up onto the stage and strut her stuff.  And pole dancing isn’t just for enticement anymore.  It has become a respected and very effective form of exercise.  Just about every middle-class suburb has (you guessed it!) pole-dancing exercise classes.  “Work your core while driving your hubby crazy”.  Sounds great to me!

Foxy’s Toybox offers dance poles that are made specifically for the home user.  This is got to be one of the best things yet.  Poles can be permanently mounted, or, some are even portable, allowing you to quickly and easily get them out of sight if you’re having “sensitive” company come over for dinner. 

Pole dancing can really spice up a relationship.  A couple spins and flips will make date night unforgettable.  You can purchase an entire “fantasy” kit, with pole, music cd, feathery boa, and play money.  Many times suggestive outfits can be worn to make the fantasy even more realistic.  Want realism?  Try adding club lighting to the night.  All you’ll need are some watered down drinks and overpriced valet service and you’ve got the whole package!

And, as an added bonus, the dance pole is the only piece of exercise equipment you can’t pile a bunch of clothes on when you’re too busy to work out. ;)

As a cautionary note, please, please, please, study a bit before getting acrobatic on a pole.  A twisted ankle or pulled muscle can really put a damper on playtime.  Instructional books are available.  And the books can also give you some great ideas for combining simple poses and dance steps.  You’ll look like a pro in no time!

Vibrating Panties

Say, what’s that muted buzzing you hear?  Just find the woman with beads of sweat on her brow and a far-off look in her eye.  Yeah, the one with the table cloth bunched up in her hand.  Yes, sir, it’s the age of the vibrating panties!  There are few things more exciting than the secret joy of vibrating panties, or as my friend Suzanne calls them, Shaky Britches.  It’s the ultimate “down-low” toy:  Calm on the outside, wild on the inside.

Many of us have a secret fantasy life.  I personally believe the vibrating panty is the perfect way to get that secret thrill we look for in a public place.  They are perfectly discreet, giving you anywhere from mild to intense pleasure, without the person next to you having the slightest clue as to what’s going on.  One cautionary note, though.  If you’re sitting on a wooden bench, everybody else on that bench will be in on your secret pretty quickly.  Of course, that could be a thrill, too.  You can watch them try to figure out who’s buzzing the bench.  Or see, who leaves and who stays… ooh, that sounds fun!

Foxy’s Toybox offers an impressive line of vibrating panties.  Whether you want something discrete to add a little hum to your evening, or a remote control option to give your partner some say in the play.  Vibrating panties usually come with a panty made with a pocket to hold the massager.  But now days, there are options that include magnetic vibrators that attach to any garment, or strapless “thong” type panties that actually hug the crotch and hold themselves up.

As far as remote controlled vibrators go, most work up to 10 or 15 feet away.  There’s nothing like giving the remote to your partner and letting him/her control what you get and when you get it.  Like just as the waiter comes up to take your dinner order, or on the dance floor, or while the valet is helping you out of the car.  The surprises are endless.

Club Vibe2.0

My favorite remote is the ClubVibe 2.0 by OhMiBod.  Not only is it remotely controlled with five different vibration patterns, but the remote has a microphone built in.  It can be set to pulse to the dance music.  Now that’s feeling the beat!  But, best of all, it can also be actuated by your partner’s voice if you’re in a quiet enough room.  Imagine your man telling you to squirm… and you have no choice.

It’s important to note the size before ordering.  Some panties are, of course, small, medium, large, or extra-large.  Many are stretchable, to accommodate a range of sizes.  There is even a strapless thong for larger women.

One good thing about all vibrating panties is this, you can remove the device before tossing the panty into the wash.  After all, if they do their job right, you will need to wash the panties (wink).  And please, please, remember to get a good toy cleaner to keep your massager fresh and pleasant.  

Ben Wa and Kegel Balls

The origin of Ben Wa balls is shrouded in mystery, lies and hyperbole.  Ok, that’s a bit harsh, but the truth is, their origin is more speculation than fact.  They were definitely developed in the Orient, and some say near the Ming dynasty period, possibly in the 15^th century.  They were originally used as a single ball, inserted into the vagina, to enhance the man’s pleasure during sex.  It is believed that the first Ben Wa balls were repurposed Bauding balls.  But, again, there is no evidence to support this claim.

 Women, of course, figured out pretty quickly how good these little gems felt rolling around in their vaginas, and started using them for their own pleasure and sexual enhancement.  Many Ben Wa balls come in decorative, pillowed boxes, and can be purchased in different sizes, depending on the skill level of the user.  Larger balls for the novice user, and smaller balls for those who have developed their pelvic floor muscles.  The smaller the balls, of course, the more effort it takes to keep them in.

Ben Wa balls can be miskaken for Bauding balls, and vice versa.  Bauding exercise balls are hollow spheres with a weighted ball and chime inside.  The two balls are held in one hand and rotated around each other, building hand strength, dexterity, whereas Ben Wa balls are often solid and weighted.  The balls are often used in physical therapy after an accident or injury.  The repetitive motion and pleasant sound of the chimes also relieves stress.  In recent years, a string or chain has been added to aid in the retrieval of the balls.  These are often referred to as Kegel balls.

Kegel Exercise Cross-Section

Kegel balls are named after gynecologist, Arnold Kegel, who invented the Kegel perineometer (to measure the strength of pelvic floor muscles.  Dr. Kegel spent a lot of time researching female genital prolapse and urinary stress incontinence at USC, and developed a series of exercised designed to strengthen women’s’ pelvic floor muscles, thus alleviating these conditions.  He published his findings in 1948, and it wasn’ t long after that people started using the balls along with Dr. Kegel’s exercise program.

Kegel exercisers can also be found in barbell form, electro-stimulators, vibrating balls, lighted, glow-in-the-dark, and a staggering variety of sizes and colors. 

 2011 saw a national run on Ben Wa / Kegal balls when they were brought to the spotlight through the hit novel series, “Fifty Shades of Grey”.  Fortunately, manufacturers across the globe have retooled their production facilities, added staff and shifts and are manufacturing balls at an impressive rate.  “Fifty Shades” is scheduled to release a movie version of the books in summer 2013.  And as more and more of mainstream America is introduced to these magical spheres, I predict another shortage.

 Ben Wa and/or Kegel balls, like any other item inserted into the vagina, must be kept clean.  Always use a quality toy cleaner before and after use.  And don’t forget a nice lubricant.  For added sensation, try a warming or cooling lube, found here at Foxy’s Toybox.  Also, please, check what material your balls are made of.  Many plastics and rubbers do not play well with silicone lubricants.  You may want to stick to water-based and (my personal favorite) gel lubes.

PLEASURE TAPE

Many people start squirming uncomfortably when the word “bondage” is thrown into a conversation. Of course, others start squirming for much more sensual reasons when the word “bondage” is mentioned. But we don’t need to explain too much about that here.

The truth is, there are tons of us out there who are open to exploration during their play time, but don’t know where to start, or what toys to experiment with. Many people turn to the ol’ tried and true duct tape. Then, when attempting to free their partner from the tape, they find the adhesive has a mind of its own. This has a way of mitigating the bondage experience. And possibly turning someone away from it for good.


One of the most versatile pleasure play items in the bondage family is tape, or as many call it, Pleasure Tape. Pleasure tape is made of self-sticking vinyl. What does that mean? Well, well, it means that you can play all you want and never have to worry about icky adhesives sticking to your clothes and skin and pulling all the hairs out of your arms. It only sticks to itself, not you. And it’s an inexpensive entry point for beginners exploring bondage for the first time.

What can you do with pleasure tape? Many will bind hands or feet. Some will wrap their partner all the way up to the elbows. The wrists and ankles can be tied to bedposts, wrist to ankle, arm to thigh, or any configuration you can dream up. The options are countless. Pleasure tape can also be wrapped around your partner’s body and be used as costume clothing.

Many people will incorporate blindfolds into their tape play. Others will bring riding crops or feather play into the arena, also. Vinyl pleasure tape can be unwound, cleaned and used again in your next play session; making it a better value than single-use adhesive tape.

It is always important to play responsibly. One should always have a safe word established with your play partner. A word or phrase that means “stop now”. Many will say something like “Peanut Butter” or “Door Knob”. Something that is easily recognized and not likely used during sex play. While participating in bondage play, one should always be aware of binding too tightly and cutting off your partner’s circulation. Check often while tying, to make sure the skin doesn’t bulge between strips of tape. Lay the tape flat and don’t let it twist. Check for fingers and toes turning white or growing cold. Ask your partner often if they’re comfortable, experiencing any tingling or pinching. If so, stop, unwrap, and start again with a looser wrap. Always leave your partner with some way to communicate with you. Another key safety practice is to have blunt-nosed safety scissors nearby in case your partner needs to be released quickly.


Pleasure tape has found a home in the Piercing world, also. It works perfectly as a stretching aid. While many have traditionally used electrical tape for stretching, the adhesive in the tape often causes irritation, swelling and can lead to nasty infections. Vinyl pleasure tape, on the other hand, is perfectly safe. Just wrap a layer or two around your plug, add just a touch of petroleum jelly for lubrication, and slip right into the ear hole being stretched. Pleasure tape will never cause irritation.

PROSTATE MASSAGERS

Prostate Corss-Section

So, what is the prostate? The prostate is part of the male reproductive system. It secretes the slightly alkaline milky substance that forms part of the seminal fluid that transports sperm. Sperm is produced in the testicles, which also make the male hormone testosterone. Testosterone stimulates the growth and function of the prostate during puberty, and also makes prostatic fluid for semen.

During sexual climax (orgasm), the muscles of the prostate contract to push semen through the urethra and out the penis. The urethra also carries urine. When the penis is erect during sexual intercourse, the flow of urine is blocked from the urethra, allowing only semen to be ejaculated at orgasm

A prostate massager refers to devices for massaging the prostate gland, mainly for sexual purposes.



The shape of a prostate massager is similar to a finger, since prostate massages are traditionally given digitally. They usually have a slightly curved head to effectively massage the prostate. A prostate massager should be used with care because of the sensitivity of the prostate. Correct use involves a medium to light repetitive massage, or circular motion—the tool should never be thrusted.

Prostate massage equipment ranges from dildos tobutt plugs and G-spot vibrators. When used in sexual practice, prostate massagers are commonly referred to as "prostate toys" and "anal toys". These prostate massagers are inserted into the rectum through the anus and are intended to stimulate the prostate by simple massaging or vibrating. They are used during foreplay by many couples.

Prostate stimulation is thought to produce stronger and more powerful orgasms similar to orgasms in women produced by G-spot stimulation.

Prostate dildos are similar to the vaginal dildos, but they tend to be more curved, slimmer and with a softer texture. Some of the new prostate dildos on the market are driven by batteries and offer vibration at the tip, which may be changed depending on the personal preference. Unlike the vaginal dildos, the anal prostate massager has a flared end to prevent from being lost in the rectum.

Many men prefer butt plugs, which are easy to use, can be inserted freely and left in place while the man's hands are free for other sexual activities such as masturbation. Anal plugs come also in various shapes, sizes and designs and although they are not commonly intended to stimulate the prostate, newer models of more angled butt plugs are now developed to provide a more vigorous massage to the prostate. The new butt plugs have a more curved shape and they are slightly longer than the regular anal plugs. They commonly have a narrow neck and a flared end to prevent losing it in the rectum. Some of the newer models come with batteries and wireless remotes that increase sexual pleasure.

*It’s important to note that prostate massagers should never be used if you have acute prostatitis, because the infection can spread elsewhere in the body if massage is performed. It’s also important to lubricate your toy and your body before insertion and massage. Always use a quality anal lube and have plenty of toy cleaner on hand.

Prostate massage has been around for nearly 2,000 years. There is more to prostate massagers than just sexual pleasure. One can also achieve a significant health benefit from occasionally milking the prostate gland.

NIPPLE CLAMPS

Nipple clamps, eh? So, the big question is this: Are nipple clamps for the dom to enjoy or for the sub? Wonderfully, it’s pretty fantastic for both! Doms get the erotic thrill of seeing the clamps on their favorite pet. And the sub, well… they get the big thrill. Have you noticed that I’m not talking about just women? Yes, Virginia, men can be clamped, too. Any nipple is fair game.

Nipple clamps work like this. The clamp, usually clip, or sometimes two thin sticks held together with rubber bands, are placed on the erect nipples. They restrict blood flow, causing the nipple to become engorged and very sensitive. She also gets a rush of sensation when the clamps are removed.

Barring the homemade varieties, and some of the more radical inventions out there, you can find three major types of clamp on the market:

Tweezer Clamps – usually thin strips of metal or wood, connected at one end and open at the other. The open end of the camps may be covered with rubber or vinyl to protect the wearers’ sensitive flesh. After all, these babies are used for enjoyment, not extracting national secrets. There is often a rubber band around the lower end of the strips, used to adjust the amount of pressure applied.
Butterfly Clamps – By far the most exquisite looking. Butterfly clamps are almost exclusively metal, they do not have soft pads to protect the skin. These are the most painful of the three. Best used for the most pressure. Butterfly Clamps, along with Clothespin Clamps are often used when a dom wants to clamp skin elsewhere on the body of the sub. This is serious BDSM stuff and can be very painful.

Clothespin Clamps – These are the most common type of nipple clamp. They are hinged with a spring in the center of the two metal/wood strips much like a laundry clothespin. They will often have rubber or vinyl covers ofe the ends to protect the user’s skin, and may also have a thumb screw stopper to adjust the amount of pressure applied. In recent years, Clothespin Clamps can be fitted with small vibrating nodules, similar to bullet massagers. This adds weight to the clamps, pulling downward on the nipple and giving the user a very nice buzz, too.

Nipple clamps of all varieties are often connected by a metal chain adding variety to the play. Some will also be fitted with weights. The chains and weights can used to tug on the nipples and increase sensation for the user, or train a slave to hold still during a session. Nipple Clamps can also be purchased with hanging jewelry, to make your play partner even sexier.

Please use caution while using nipple clamps. Check often with your sub to make sure they aren’t being harmed. Play is fun, irreversible harm is cruelty. And none of us here want to cross that line. If play gets too intense, have a numbing spray or cream handy to help your sub feel better quickly.

And it’s always good to reward a compliant partner with something edible. Foxy’s Toybox now offers the GoodHead line of suckers. They are availabe in a variety of delicious flavors, and are formulated to excite the saliva glands. And I don’t have to tell you how that can enhance playtime.

Play safely, please be mindful of your partner’s comfort level. And, as always, use a quality toy cleaner when done.

INTERACTIVE VIBRATORS

I don’t believe I’ve ever come across anything more exciting than vibrators that respond to their external environment. And the great folks at OhMiBod and Califorina Exotics are creating that level of excitement every day with their incredible sound-reactive products.

Foxy’s offers four different interactive vibrators: the OhMiBod Music Powered Vibrator, the OhMiBod Club Vibe 2.Oh, the OhMiBod Freestyle and California Exotic's Vibro Pod Digital Music Bullet Stimulator. Each of these amazing products convert music or sound into sympathetic vibrations, allowing you or your partner to FEEL the music. Now that's total immersion!

The Vibro Pod Digital Music Bullet Stimulator is a wired vibe that connects to any mp3 player. It comes with two interchangealbe bullets to fit your size and mood. It has eight functions including music vibration mode. It also has an adapter to allow you to listen through your headphones while enjoying the stimulation from the Rubber Cote bullet...The OhMiBod Music Powered Vibrator is also a wired vibe, but with a full 7.5" vibrator instead of a bullet. It comes with a headphone adapter and a velvet privacy pouch. The OhMiBod also works with laptops, home stereos, portable CD players, microphones, electric guitars - virtually any electronic audio output source with a 3.5mm jack.

The OhMiBod Freestyle is a dual-motor "rabbit style" wireless device with a node for clitoral stimulation.
Like all OhMiBod vibes, the Freestylehas 3 standard speeds and 4 amazing pre-set patterns for you to choose from. You can even remotely control the vibrator with an iPhone App! Now that's entertainment!

And my personal favorite, the OhMiBod Club Vibe is a wireless stimulator that fits into a custom black lace thong. It can be worn just about anywhere. And that means you're free for discrete playtime, any time anywhere, without folks knowing your secret. They will see you smile, though. The five intensity levels and ambient sound setting will see to that. The vibe is usb recharable, and the wireless remote hold a discreet microphone for picking up the beat at the club... or a lover's voice in a quiet room. The rest is up to you!
 

For my taste, these toys work best with water-based lubricants. Foxy's Toybox offers a wide selection to choose from, including warming, cooling and flavored lubes. And as always, don't forget your batteries and toy cleaners! It's important to thoroughly clean your devices after every use. And it's always a good idea to store your toys in their pouches, if one has been included.